Sunday, April 5, 2009


Psalm 56:13 vs 8 "You have seen me tossing and turning through the night. You have collected all my tears and preserved them in your bottle! You have recorded every one in your book."
It has been 2 yrs and one week since we began the adoption process. It has been almost 90 days since we were shown our daughters sweet precious face. ..and every day after that WE dream of the day to finally hold her. She just turned 8 months old this week. Think of all that we have missed out on! But yes we will have a life time with her....that I am grateful!! But to be truthful I do have my moments with this long wait. Last Friday was especially one of those days, it was a hard day when I realized the travel call was not going to come. Last week I was also told that we still may need to wait longer. ...but no answer as to why!! Those of us in the adoption world know how exciting it is to check off your list of the things that need to happen. On our list the last thing that had to happen was Grace needed to be issued her final VI (visa). That happened on 3/30. This was the last step I had to check off. "So I thought". So needless to say to hear we may need to wait longer has been a huge set back for me emotionally....basically we are up in the air....we know nothing and have no information as to why there may be more time. We hurried to get everything done, God moved mountains and I believe He still can, but now we again wait, and no idea as to how much longer!!! Tears now are not easily held back with me. They seem to flow pretty easily, and at strange times. No one understands this feeling unless you are going through it. I do know many families who are...they are waiting for something to get done.....something to happen...and answers to be said....This is not easy...It is hard! My heart was so set on having her home for will she be home with us or not? Is it possible that she will miss her First Easter with her forever family? Do I even hope anymore to only get my heart broken.? I do believe God is in control. I do believe He has perfect timing!! I do believe He loves us more than we can imagine....and I believe He holds my every single tear I cry.......

1 comment:

Krista said...

You finally got Grace's name in Korean characters, just how you wanted it! It looks great; even better than all the attempts we made that night at your house! I know she will be home soon, and I keep praying for her. She needs to be home with you just as much as you need her!! When it comes, it will be the happiest blessing I will have witnessed in a long time! I love you and and can't wait for Gracie to be a part of the family that means so much to me!